Just for Grins…
An elderly woman and her little grandson, whose face was sprinkled with bright red freckles, spent the afternoon at the zoo. Lots of children were waiting in a line to get their cheeks painted by a local artist who was decorating them with pictures of assorted zoo animals. “You’ve got so many freckles, there’s no place to paint,” a little girl standing in line said to the little boy. Embarrassed, the little boy dropped his head in shame.
His grandmother, understanding the hurt her granchild was feeling, knelt down next to him and while lovingly tracing her finger across the child’s cheek, she said, “I love your freckles. When I was a little girl, I always wanted freckles. Freckles are beautiful!”
The boy looked up and exclaimed, “Really?”
“Of course,” said the grandmother. “Why, just name me one thing that’s prettier than freckles.”
The little boy thought for a moment, peered intensely into his grandma’s face, and softly whispered, “Wrinkles.”
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An older gentleman is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling.
“I’m okay, but I didn’t particularly like the four-letter word the doctor used during the surgery,” he answered.
“And what did the doctor say?” asked the nurse.
“Oops!!”
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Two old friends met again for the first time since graduating from high school some fifty years ago. One asked curiously of the other, “You were always so popular and organized in school. Did you manage to live a well-planned life?”
“Well, yes,” replied her friend. “My first marriage was to a wealthy millionaire; my second marriage was to a famous actor; my third marriage was to a preacher; and now I am married to an undertaker.”
“My,” said the friend, “but just what do those marriages have to do with a well-planned life?”
“Easy,” she replied. “It was one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.”
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Did you know light travels faster than sound? That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
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A husband and wife were celebrating a combination 60th birthday party and their 40th anniversary. While the party was in full swing, a fairy showed up offering each an opportunity to have any one wish granted.
The husband being a gentleman told the wife that she could have the first wish.
“I’ve always thought that a cruise around the world for two would be fantastic,” she said.
The fairy picked up her wand, and “Whoosh” she held in her hand two tickets for an around-the-world cruise. The fairy then turned to the waiting husband and asked what wish he would like to have fulfilled.
He responded, “I have always thought it would be nice to have a beautiful wife 30 years younger than me.”
“Whoosh” went the fairy as she waved her magic wand a second time, and just like that the husband turned 90.
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